Chicago Gluttons - Chicago Restaurant Review & Obsession

There are obviously dollar bills to be made off of breakfast in 2007. Every time I open the Reader it seems like someone’s opening a new fancypants joint that specializes in egg dishes or French toast. This is a fortunate arrangement for gluttons like us, as we are typically willing–nay, compelled–to exchange American currency for delicious eats shortly after waking. Too bad we don’t all have this guy’s life.

A kindred soul.

Having no one to bring us cow-pie pancakes with cloth napkins in bed, we rely instead on the the M. Henrys and Oranges of the world to cook us breakfast. This is not a bad arrangement. In fact, I’d say we win most of the time. Bacon tastes better than a fistful of singles any day of the week.

So, last week, in need of early nourishment, we hopped to Over Easy, a breakfast joint near Winnemac Park that opened a few years ago, burned down, and reopened again this past year. It looks like the kind of place that has roasted red pepper in at least two dishes: small storefront space, brightly colored decor, clever breakfast reference in name, 30-something patrons. And indeed it is that kind of place. We were seated at a bright window table, where we were immediately served Julius Meinl coffee and fresh-squeezed juices. I tried the Freckled OJ, which consists of orange juice blended (mixed?) with strawberries. ‘Shit was true, friends. Fresh, and not overly berried. OE also offers a Blackeye OJ, which is the same thing except with blackberries. I’ve a bit of a beverage fetish so I ordered the grapefruit juice just to try it, which turned out to be a well-played move on my part. In the same way Cholula on the table makes any meal tolerable, fresh juices increase a dining experience by a factor of at least 7.4, which also happens to be the number of times I’ve unsnapped my pants in a public place because I overate. (Anyone who’s ever tried to encourage third base by example knows what a .4 unsnap is.)

Freckled OJ, aka Whitey

Over Easy’s breakfast menu is standard for contemporary American brunch. It’s mostly twists on classic egg dishes, with ingredients like avocados and chilies adding the twists. The three of us ordered from the savory side of the menu ’cause it was that kind of afternoon, but the sweet side looked like the winning side with ridiculously delicious-sounding items like banana-spiked French toast and Emily’s Dream Pancakes, with blackberries, orange butter, and raspberry coulis.

We had the jalapeno corncakes with red pepper sauce and the sassy eggs, a chorizo-hash combination with eggs, quacamole, cheese, ancho sauce, and sour cream. Both were excellent.

Top, the cakes. Bottom, Los Huevos de Sassy.

To prove our voracity, we ordered an extra entree so we could sample the sweet side. Maybe a bit extravagant, but that’s just how gluttons get it done. We take breakfast real slow like, bend her over easy, and then whale the living shit out of her. At least Rin Rin does. She’s raw like that.

We forgot the ingredients of this cranberry French toast but fuck it was tasty.

Overall, Over Easy was very solid. There’s nothing on the menu that separates it from all the other contemporary American brunch joints in the city but if I lived anywhere near the neighborhood I’m sure I’d eat there several times a month.

Finding the Honeymoon Café amongst all the restaurants on Argyle Street is hard, but finding a reason to eat there is much easier. I strolled into this nook right before the lunch hour and when I sat down I was wondering why I wanted to stay at a place like this. The ambience is as drab as your local area clinic, with a 1970 cabin rustic feel. It seemed like the break room for employees of a much larger Chinese restaurant.

In the end I did decide to stay and found exactly what I needed to stay, a $4.00 lunch special menu. I figure I won’t have to risk too much to give it a try. The menu was filled with sweet and sours, salty and spicy, and more noodles than Chef Boyardee. The options were plentiful, I half expected slop to arrive on my plate, but when my order of salt and pepper fillet arrived, I was surprised at the crunchy outside and the soft flaky center inside. This was actually good and I took a second to take in the scene of the restaurant, the place had filled up and people were ordering from the non-lunch special menu. An Asian person passing up deals for food is no joke. Either they are not really Asian or yes, the food has to be that good.

So if you want quality cheap eats for lunch then you should hit this place up.

• Name: Honeymoon Cafe
• Where: 1138 W Argyle St Chicago, IL 60640
•  Phone Number: (773) 271-6668

What does the typical Ghanaian dining experience look like? Basically, it looks like this:

Akwaaba (welcome) to the Palace Gate Restaurant, the illist Uptown spot reppin West Africa something propa…

First thing: unless Ghanaians know you or you speak the language, they will pay you little mind. During our first visit at the Palace, our table was ignored for 4-5 minutes while our waitress sat and talked to friends. Eventually the server came and told us that all the food “was finished.”

A foreign customer might wonder if these kats even WANT business. And it holds tru that a majority of patrons come to the Palace to watch various UEFA matches on the High Def flat screen. When there’s no food, at least there’s football.

To avert this situation happening to us again, we met at 11:30am to beat the famished Sunday church crowd.

Interior: Fake flowers lend ambiance and are set on tables covered in plastic dresses to downpress omnipresent soup spills. The walls of the restaurant are scant; displaying pix of baby and adult J.C. and Mama Ghana’s classic Adinkra Symbols. The silver fan in the corner blows like a Kansas City tornado straight outta Oz. Black Africans stare and giggle at “the obruni-squad” (a.k.a. foreigners) like they have three breasts.

Hungry yet? A bin wahaa (that means get some in Twi)….We get three dishes for three heads.  First, the omo tuo (rice balls) come in a groundnut or peanut butter soup served with fresh red snapper and a bit of fresh pepper.

Yea, there’s some tripe in the soup, but its in all the dishes kid…eat the meat and just poke around the rest.

Next up, the fufu and light soup. A traditional staple for Ghanaians, the yellow ”ball” is basically any kind of starch-potato, yam, or plantain-pounded until it gains the perfect elasticity. This is then served alongside a tomato soup and various proteins.  Sound weird? Don’t think, don’t chew, just dunk and swallow it down.

Finally, jallof rice and kontumere stew. The rice starts off white, but is then marinated in tomatoes, onion and herbs. After some hours, it turns red. For the greens, think kale or collards. This vegetable is slow boiled and mixed with palm nut oil (red lard) for a matter of hours. The result is veggie heaven. Add some fried fish tale, and you’ll be throwing out Tiger Woods fist pumps.

The Palace is a ethnic restaurant that does not serve many foreigners. Don’t get your little feelings hurt when you walk in and are not pampered. Exercise patience and roll with it glutton.

• Name: Palace Gate
• Where: 3405 Park Place Evanston, IL 60201
•  Phone Number: (847) 256-8662