By: Josh

Josh — Tue, 03 Nov 2009 20:36:25 +0000

eating a five guys burger is like staring into the face of Jesus Christ as you take him as your lord and personal savior. They just opend one 5 minutes away from my place, so i was interested to see if they were as good of quality here as they are in the DC area which is where i had my first Five Guys expierence. I sat and waited for lucky number 21 to be called out by a hairy thick accented eastern european man, it took every bit of me to hold back the tears of joy. I waited with nervous anticipation as if i were just moments away from loseing my virginity to the prom queen. When they called my number i was shaking like michael J Fox after getting out of the shower on a cold Montana morning. I took my tray and thanked the hairy eastern european man. I contemplated jumping across the counter and holding him in a long embrace, whispiring my most sincerest thank you’s into his ear, but i didnt want to make a bigger scene than the one i knew i was going to make and unable to avoid. I unwrapped the foil that coverd my burger as hastily as a child opens his present from Santa on Christmas morning. I stared at this delicious ball of organized mess overwhelmed with feelings of Pure joy. For the first time in a long time i felt at total peace.I then took my first bite of the double bacon cheesburger i had orderd, There was a calm that fell over the store, everything went silent, I looked around and the world was moving in slow motion. I felt myself leave my earthly body and was hovering above the store looking down at the others. What just happend? Did i die before I could enjoy my meal? I wasnt sure what to make of this. I loved the fact that i was wheightless, and had the ability of flight, I flew around for a minute looking at the expressions people made everytime the took a bite. Expressions of glee, Happiness, joy and a little bit of confusion. but i was upset that i was staring at the most delicious burger ever to be put on the face of gods green earth, created by the most advanced species ever to inhabit the planet and was unable to eat it. At that point in time i was sucked back into my earthly body holding my burger. I took a second bite and began to wheep like a soldier returning from Iraq and seeing his child in person for the first time. The rest is a blur, eating a Five Guys burger is like haveing sex on extacy. I walked back to my car exhausted, with a rock hard erection and ready to take a nap. Simply put This is the best Burger You will ever expirience.

By: Angelo

Angelo — Wed, 21 Oct 2009 02:32:08 +0000

If you want a truly great fast food burger head on up street from 5 guys to Clark St Dog. The burgers are fresh, the fries are crisp and not soggy and burn’t, They also have cheese fries. Not available and the joint above. The dogs are local and not imitations from out east. You’ll also save money. Check out why they have been in business for 25 yrs.

By: Stereo Radiation

Stereo Radiation — Sat, 20 Jun 2009 14:47:20 +0000

The best cheeseburger in the Midwest is Redamak’s in New Buffalo, just off 94 a Couple of miles north of the Michigan/Indiana state line. The fries would not reqire some crazy wager to eat either. And they serve beer.

By: mr c

mr c — Tue, 28 Apr 2009 17:11:01 +0000

I just tried a WTF burger (added bacon) at a new Five Guys locations in Fort Myers FL. My mouth was very pleased… Thanks for the flavor tip!

Comments on: Five Guys Ran a Train on My Mouth

By: Josh

By: Angelo

By: Stereo Radiation

By: c4mden

By: mr c